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Dear Captain Spaulding, Thank you for applying at Clowns Incorporated! We appreciate the time you took to consider us, we know there are many clown companies looking for talent out there in today’s day and age. We are currently closing our application process for scary, unhinged clowns at the moment. Unfortunately, parents don’t find dark humor as funny when it is unfurling at their children’s birthday parties. And while we’re sure there is a place for your threatening demeanor elsewhere, we feel it would be a challenge to place you with any of our clients at this time. We’re impressed by your experience, running the Museum of Monsters and Madmen seems like quite the responsibility and creative outlet, though we’re not sure what that dark tourist attraction has to do with our family-friendly cooperation. Please take this rejection letter knowing that we admire your dedication to clowning. Please don’t hurt us, Jumbo the Clown, Sr Vice President of Clowns IncProduct DetailsWe can’t imagine that this famous clown from the Devils Rejects and House of 1000 Corpses would feel at home making animal balloons at a kid’s birthday party. Though his dark demeanor is subtle enough when it comes to his costume. It’s all about attitude with this character. A matching satin texture suit flaunts both red and white stripes as well as patriotic stars. A skull detailed bowtie is the only thing that hints to onlookers that they’d better be on their guard. That is until Captain Spaulding opens his mouth.Tourist TrapWhile Captain Spaulding might have been rejected by almost everyone, even the devil, he sure is a hit around Halloween! Whether you’re dressing up for a party or you’re hosting a Halloween fight night, you’ll love acting out as this classic character created by Rob Zombie. Now, will you be able to freak tourists out as efficiently as our unhinged anti-hero? Well, that’s all about attitude… and plenty of greasepaint.